Shamed. Shocked. Scared.

By Tanya Bhargava

Is it rape? Is it my fault? Is my clothing too provocative?

Rape: it’s not just an incident, it’s a never healing wound like a blood stain on a crisp white sheet; it never goes away.

None of this is her fault.

As a matter of fact, our society has manifested in our brains to blame the victim, shown by the words of M.L. Sharma.“If you put your diamond on the street, certainly the dog will take it out. You can’t stop it.” 6

Yes, she is a diamond, but she isn’t a showpiece. She is not up for sale. She doesn’t deserve to be locked up inside a showcase.

We can stop it.

Teach him manners. Teach him the difference between a ‘yes’ and a ‘no’. Teach him a no means no, not a maybe. No is NOT a discussion matter. He needs to listen to her answer, her plea. Rape is a horrendous offense and these ghastly assaulters are gaining strength every second.

Not only does such a merciless offense only take place where “things like these are seen as okay while attackers are growing up…” 5, they also have it ingrained in their heads that “…because she is less important you can do whatever you want with her.” 5 This is wrong. This is where change is required.

We need to change our mentality.

Rape victims are humans just like us. She doesn’t deserve to be left on the street bleeding in pain after being beaten and raped by these heartless, inhumane calluses.

We need to stop. We need to ask ourselves.

If a man can walk the streets freely without the thought of danger lurking over his head, why can’t she? If dressing her in clothing that covers her  from head to toe doesn’t guarantee her safety, then what does? If traveling with her boyfriend doesn’t guarantee her safety, what does?

It’s not her fault that we weren’t responsible. The act he has committed is atrocious, but we still don’t realize the enormous threat he is. He doesn’t need to have a sister, mother, girlfriend, or wife to understand how to respect women. Women aren’t disposable. He is hard-hearted and cold-blooded. He can’t use women and throw them away like trash.  

Take a look at her. See what he has done. It’s not even her fault yet we hold her accountable for it. All of it.

Generally speaking, the concept of disapprobation of victim’s clothing is nothing new, a poll conducted on sexual assault can be used to debunk society’s theories. “6 out of 10 women said it was commonly believed that women who go to parties wearing provocative clothing are ‘asking for trouble.’ But the majority of men surveyed disagreed.” 3 They disagreed. They can control themselves. They can control the temptation then, why can’t he?

We all blame her but. . .

She was clothed from head to toe, yet she was ‘asking for it’.

She looked at him; he assumed he had the right to ‘make a move’, yet it was “her fault”.

She said no, yet he molested her.

Is it still her fault?

It’s time to stop blaming her for our irresponsible decisions. It’s time for us to open our eyes and expand our horizon. It’s time to tell her that these sadistic brutes will pay for her pain, her bruises and the scars he has left across her heart.

Works Cited

  1. “Rape.” Opposing Viewpoints Online Collection, Gale, 2017. Opposing Viewpoints in Context,

https://goo.gl/eTb46S. Accessed 11 Feb. 2018.

 

  1. “Violence against Women in Europe.” Tribune Content Agency Graphics, 2014. Global Issues

in Context, https://goo.gl/9rwDJj . Accessed 11 Feb. 2018.

 

  1. Bever, Lindsey. “The Persistent Myth That Revealing Clothing Leads to Rape.” The Washington

Post, WP Company, 10 Jan. 2018, https://goo.gl/HTkL4Q. Accessed 11 Feb.

2018.

 

  1. Bruni, Frank. “Romance, Rough Sex or Rape?” The New York Times, The New York Times, 3

Mar. 2018, https://goo.gl/wFJbWE. Accessed 5 Mar.  

 

  1. Udwin, Leslee and Nick Fraser. “Storyville, India’s Daughter.” BBC Four, BBC, 8 Mar. 2015,

https://goo.gl/RqngRA. Accessed 11 Feb. 2018.

 

One thought on “Shamed. Shocked. Scared.

  1. Sheher

    Your writing is brilliant, strong diction with a variety of sentence/paragraph structures helps make a convincing argument. Your bluntness is refreshing, as you don’t beat around the bush and get straight to the point, and you add imagery to put more pathos in your writing, which is very effective. I fully agree with your editorial, and the fact that society has put the blame on the victims rather than the attackers. It’s about time we change our viewpoint and hold people responsible for their actions, especially with something as terrible as sexual assault/rape.

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